Community Service Sentence


 I don't know if my parents had been reading some new age parenting book or if they had just suffered some head trauma but the next day when they were going to decide on my punishment for my intention to [possibly vandalize they said that they were going to wait until the end of the day when the whole family could get together and we would have a family council. Family councils in our house only went one way, we would all throw out ideas, my dad would tell us why they were all stupid or were not going to be acceptable and then we would go with his plan he had in mind before we started. This is how we choose to get a cow;
Family: 7 Against:
Dad: 1 For
Result: Got the cow
And how we choose where to go on vacation;
Family:The beach, Disney Land, Sea World, Lake Powell
Dad:Fish Lake
Result: Fish lake
He would always start out pretending that he was honestly seeking our opinions and then get really frustrated about 30 minutes in that we didn't pick his idea, start yelling and tell us what we had chosen as a group. After a few times dancing this parsimonious pas de duex my brother and I would just start out mocking him and asking what we were going to decide on as a family in the end so we could save the time and dignity of this farce. That would make him extra mad and he would skip to the part where he just told us what we were going to do faster. That, constant reader, is what we call a win-win in the business world. In this disciplinary council family meeting, the first of its kind and maybe the last if I remember right, my mom and dad explained what I had been up to; sneaking out and thinking about toilet papering. Then they asked what my punishment should be, the suggestions ranged from grounding to extra chores but when the peanut gallery had had its turn at sham democracy my dad said that because I was trying to destroy the community, (c'mon dad, destroy?) I should have to do community service as punishment. He said I had to get documentation that I had done 6 hours of community service signed by an adult before I could go play, drive the car or have any extra privileges. I have seen starlets get less for drunk driving.