I
thought that the prom, with its literary and cinematographic
reputation for being the time of great sexual transition in a young
man's life would be a great time to get my first kiss from my
girlfriend. To that end I made some rather extensive plans to ask her
out, and thus stake my claim, well before the time generally
considered reasonable. Generally, 2 to 3 weeks before a dance was
sufficient time to ensure that you would have a date that wasn't
barrel scrapings. Not that everything you find when you are scraping
the barrel is necessarily barrel scrapings per se it is just
there is a good chance that is what you find when you wait till all
of the good dibs have been dibed. Even with two weeks maybe you
didn't get the particular date you wanted first go, but then you
still had some built-in buffer before you may be on the verge of
beginning to have to scrape barrel where you would find whomever of
God's precious daughters that were left over. The logic is sound. To
avoid any confusion about who was who's date I made my move about
eight weeks early. I got my little arts and crafts project together,
which was the modus operandi for inviting people to a dance
with you at my high school. I think it had something to do with
putting secret message in an Oreo and putting lots of decoy Oreos
into a jar, or that could of been the way that she answered me with a
similarly mandated arts and crafts project. Either way she said yes
and she told me a couple times running up to the big day that other
people had asked her if she had been asked already, boys and girls
included, and they were all very surprised that she been snatched up
so much in advance. I was not ashamed that I was the earliest of iron
striking birds and no-looky leapers, I got what I came for and I made
sure of that. I went to work making plans with other friends about
the required day-time activity and how we would not be meeting up
with them until dinner. I was planning a romantic date for two and
glommers on need not apply. This, combined with my woeful lack of
direction in big cities turned out to be a bit of a mistake by which
I mean it was a major cluster mess.
