Scorched Earth Swears

Hours and hours of fun. Just add naughty words.

After reading that last post my good friend Cole, who was in the class with me, reminded me of another funny story from advanced drafting classes. There was a game, Scorched Earth, that was passed around on floppy disks that a guy with a little knowledge of how the computer's operating system worked could install on any of the school's computers and play during work time. Scorched earth was a tank battle physics simulation that pitted two or more tanks against each other in various bleak landscapes. Each tank had a turn to attack dialing in the angle and power estimated to put your bomb on your enemy. If you missed the land all around your bomb strike would vaporize and dramatically change the landscape. Every time a tank shot it would let out a text based battle cry like “No Surrender!” or “Sic Simper Tyranus” you know, the classics? One day when we were not drawing random projects on the Laser Cad drafting program I tracked down the text file that had the battle cry data base and a few of us spent an hour or so replacing all of the inoffensive battle cries with vulgar and crude ones that would appeal to the tastes of sixteen-year-old boys. A 'Bombs Away!' was replaced with a 'Take it All!', an innocuous 'For Glory!' would now be the much more offensive 'Show Me Your *&%@'. There were lots more and some with the king boss swear word that probably were not on the borderline. It was all intended as some good harmless lowbrow fun until one day we were turned in by one of our fellow students and when we came to class the drafting coach was pretty upset about our shenanigans and threatened to throw us out of the class unless we deleted the game and the bad swears. I think we did because we were not thrown out.