For the record, I didn't learn any chemistry in chemistry class. The teacher was not very focused, not very knowledgeable, and not very interested in us. What he was prone to was long meandering stories almost always with an inappropriate-for-the-age-group payoff, and spasms of rage which I have discussed previously. In fact we were so busy not learning diddly that we ran out of time and didn't even get started on squat. All this not learning left plenty of time in class for goofing off, messing around, messing off and, God willing, even goofing around. We would talk, joke, flirt with underclass girls, you know? The basic required stuff in the core curriculum for chemistry I would assume. Most of it wasn't very productive but one day one of my brothers friends who sat in front of me had a book called the Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy. I was drawn to it because it had the words "DON'T PANIC" in large, friendly letters on the cover. If any of you are fans of the book will recognize that I stole that last line from the book, if you're not a fan of the book, I made up that last line all by myself and it's pretty funny. Anyway, he was a pretty mellow kid named Jeremy and asked if I could borrow the book because he said he had finished reading it. I got one page into it and I was hooked. The book I had my hand was actually five separate books that had been bound together into one big omnibus edition and from the time I started reading in the alleged chemistry class straight through until about four o'clock in the morning I was consuming some top-notch sci-fi parody comedy as fast as I could. I finished all five books in about two days and then had that missing-a-step in the dark feeling I get when there is no more story and I am still unsatisfied. I have recommended it to anybody who asks me ever since. In all honesty though, the first two or three books a pretty good but the last two are not quite as clever and wearing a little thin. Yet and still, one of my all-time favorite books, so chemistry class was not a complete waste of time. Well, I thought so at the time until I went to college and had to take chemistry 101 and realized that I had not learned one shiny sliver of a damn thing at all about chemistry or following advice from the cover of books, and I panicked.