The morning of the state competition we loaded up our projects and
drove the twenty miles to the community college that was hosting the
affair. We each had a table space and chair assigned to us and told
to set up because the judges were going to come by any second. We
hurried, they didn't. I thought for some reason that the judges were
going to be people who knew something about electricity or science in
general but they were just the Governor, the mayor, some suit from
the electric company and another official looking pantsuit woman who
was ushering the judges around and reading off the names and schools
of the participants. Not a scientist or engineer in the bunch,
pathetic. They were schmoozers and I am not from that tribe and have
never picked up the nuances of the dialect with its strained
over-chipper bullshitty tones and meaningless facial expressions
which usually include too many teeth and not enough substance for my
taste. They were working up and down the isles and I had to sit next
to the kid who had won the eighth-grade state science fair
competition last year with a rather nasty looking Jacobs ladder mad
scientist looking thing. The contraption was magnificently load and
dangerous looking and made the whole room smell of ozone and I knew
we were not in the same league with this kid. I thought that because
I would have voted for him if I had a vote because his was the most
awesome. But who knows what a bunch of business and political types
would think, who knows indeed? They came to our row and Cole
demonstrated his and explained the science but had to admit unless
there was some need for static hair there was not a ton of practical
use for his machine. My girlfriend was up next and she did an awesome
job of explaining what the concept of tidal and wave generation was
all about. It was all I could do not to jump in when I felt the
information was a little inaccurate but these yahoos didn't seem to
notice that the way she was describing the process was not very
practical. When it was my turn I explained the hydro electric pros
and con and showed them my working model but knew they had no
interest in my project so I wrapped it up and let them go on to Mr.
Mad Science. He fired up the machine and produced a magnificent
lighting bolt when the voltage difference was sufficient to jump the
gap and far from being properly impressed these morons jumped back
and told him to turn it off and not to turn it back on in the
building. A scientist in his own country, amaright? They moved on
and the minders told us we were free to go until the awards ceremony
in a couple of hours. We went to the mall up the road to hang out for
a bit while I waited nervously to see if by some miracle I would be
called up to the podium. We went to the arcade and window shopped and
then my girlfriend tried to molest me in a public place as was her
custom and we ran out of time and we headed back for the big news.
