As I write about the third fight
I got in in junior high I am realizing that all three of my fights
had been with Hispanic kids. I don't believe this is because I was
racist. This is going to sound like cliché special pleading but my
best friend was Mexican. Admittedly he was a little on the white side
culturally but he was indeed brown and from Mexico. He had been
adopted at a very young age by a white family and didn't even know
how to speak Spanish but was for all technical purposes a Hispanic
and thereby proves that even though I got in three fights in Junior
High all with Hispanics I was not racist per
se. Q.E.D. I called
lots of people lots of things so it was never surprising to hear that
I had called someone something and that they were mad. It was usually
true and I would just avoid the person or try and soften them up and
apologize so when I was falsely accused I was indeed shocked. I was
in the lunchroom eating and joking with some friends when I was quite
rudely folded down into my food quite rudely by what felt like a
strong and firm gripping hand on the back of my neck. I was not
currently fearing for my life for any known acts of smartassery so I
was genuinely surprised to be attacked all unawares. While I was
being pinned quite roughly into a pile of shoestring fries and trying
to roll my head to see my attacker a deeper then average and accented
voice asked me, 'You call my girlfr'en whore?'
Still trying to salvage some
dignity I answered that I called many girls whores but I was not sure
whom his girlfriend was so I couldn't say for sure. He pushed my
head down harder and told me his girlfriend's name. She was actually
a really nice girl that I thought was pretty cute and I wouldn't mind
getting to know better but definitely not a girl that I would have
called a whore. I told him that she and I were actually on good terms
and I had never said anything like that. She I realized was there
with him and telling him to stop and that I wouldn't have said
something like that. He pushed my head down one more time and said I
was lying and that he was going to kick my ass. He suggested we
reconvene out on the back of the school so he could make good on his
offer, an idea I was not very enthusiastic about, honestly. About
this time my Much bigger and stronger than me Hispanic friend who
actually had a crush on my assailants girlfriend offered to champion
my cause himself. The attacker more had his heart set on beating up
the frail looking 80 pounder and made clear that he had no beef with
my bigger and presumably more pain inflicting friend. It was too late
and my friend went out and didn't fight for me because they just got
into a shoving and yelling match until it was broken up. My friend
benefited because his crush was disgusted by her boyfriend's behavior
and she actually dated my friend for a bit. I benefited by not
getting beat. The jerk boyfriend benefited by being rid of that whore
(his word this time after she broke up with him and he was
apologizing for accosting me) girlfriend. Win-win-win is what they
call that in the business.
