I like Geography it was Geography class that bored me to sleep. It
was right after lunch and The teacher had such a pleasant monotone
voice that he would lull me to sleep with nap-time stories about
Glasnost and whatnot. Every day for weeks even as we plunged over the
precipice of history with the end of the Cold War, the dissolution of
the USSR, and the destruction of the Berlin wall I slept soundly in
post lunch stupor. I had set a foolproof plan in motion that had me
in a secluded corner by the quiet kids where I could put my head down
and rest and I had made an agreement with the girl who sat in front
of me to rouse me 5 minutes before the end of class. I was ready to
wake-up and roll out, raring to disrupt the next class fully refilled
with the chemicals that make me want attention and disregard
consequences. This plan was clicking away beautifully but then I was
found out and embarrassed. The teacher had finally noticed that I was
exceptionally quite and still for a junior high student and one of my
sleeping days he pointed out to the rest of the class that I was
asleep which they all thought was funny because I was snoring softly.
Ha ha, the sleep deprived kid is sleeping, ha ha. He told my
waker-upper to shirk her duties and to let me sleep on into the next
class which was he prep period. I slept on through the bell and the
exodus of dismissal, right on through to the middle of the next class
when I woke up tip to top all of a spasm. I was disoriented, panicked
and not a little confused. My teacher, the jerk, caller-outer of
class sleepers said a little sassy, 'Well, good morning Mr. Gause,
did you have sweet dreams?' No, I did not, as a matter of
none-of-your-business. I was not sure what to say as this was one of
those circumstance where excuses or rationalizing just insults both
parties. I just told him sorry for sleeping in his class and he told
me that he thought it was disrespectful to the time and effort he put
into the lesson for me to pass the time in Nod and not the Balkans. I
agreed and gathered my stuff and headed out to my next class which I
was more then half late to so I decided just to wait and miss it all.
When the bell rang I found my deserter and chastised her for the
dereliction of duty and relived her of further waking
responsibilities while informing her of my deep displeasure with
being hung out to dry sleep wise. She said she was sorry and plead
for forgiveness and because she was cute and really flirty I forgave.
I didn't sleep in that class ever again and didn't fall asleep in a
class again until astronomy which has reclining chairs in the pitch
black.
