We four friends walked in to an almost empty Junior High building with me in the
lead somehow. We went by the office and picked up our schedules and
walked around the school and saw the girls we were there to meet. My
breathing went into vapor lock and I started shaking I was so nervous
I could barely talk but I was still the point man among my more timid
friends. I was working up the courage to go talk to them when my
friend Quin who was always there with a supportive word told me to,
'just go talk to them you fag.' I did just go talk to them after I
walked passed them a few times down a hall too small to walk passed
someone without common courtesy demanding a hailing. I finally got up
enough courage and went and said, “Hey hows it going?” They said
they were fine and giggled and I was still shaking and my throat was
dry so I held my schedule in both hands and asked the girls what
classes they had. We had none together but at least talking to them
calmed my nerves a little and I started to loosen up. Not on the
phone loosened up and charming but I was at least controlling the
shaking in my hands and voice. The girls asked why my friends
wouldn't come over and I told them it was because they were pussies.
Harsh? No, not for a fag like me. I waved at them and Quin, Billy and
Garret moseyed over and stood roughly behind me and still didn't talk
to the girls but kind of punched at and pushed me a little and talked
to me. I introduced the boys and introduced the girls and Quin was
the first of the second string to make an effort at some
conversation. This is going to sound out outlandish but I swear this
was his exact question, “ So, how much do you all bench?” The
girls said that they didn't know what that meant. I told them that
Quin was asking them how much weight they were able to lift on the
bench press exercise. They all laughed and said that they had never
attempted a bench press. Quin reading the cues somehow worse then I
had been reading clues all day started telling them about his
exercise routine and that he could bench 150 lbs. That may have been
impressing to the ladies if they had any idea what that meant and how
much that really was but they didn't so they just looked at him
politely and nodded. Quins bumbling was so comically bad that it
completely redeemed me and I was saved no matter how goofy I had been
in the beginning this was so much worse that I was liberated. All of
the fear and hesitation left me and I was able to just be myself
which for the first time in my life seemed to be a good thing. The
girls were laughing at my jokes and we were having fun when Billy's
sister showed up to pick us up I wasn't too sure I was going to take
her up on her offer, I just didn't know how to let her down easy. I
was so happy that I was smiling and on the verge of laughing all the
way home and the rest of the day. In my middle school every time I
interacted with girls especially cute girls there was always a subtle
undercurrent of revulsion and fear that someone would see them
talking to me and make fun of them. In this new school with new girls
they just wanted to hang out and listen to my jokes and stories so I
lauded their good taste.
